Holiday Blues: Coping with Grief During the Holidays

Grief is not typically the first word we consider when we think of the holidays. But for many, grief is the only word that comes to mind.

Whether you are experiencing grief due to the loss of a loved one, a break-up/divorce, feeling homesick away from friends and family, or due to seasonal depression, here are 16 tips to cope and manage grief this holiday season.

1. Allow yourself to grieve. You may experience a range of emotions and thoughts. Know that this is normal and a part of the grieving process. Be present with your feelings and give yourself permission to feel.

2. Maintain, modify, or create new holiday traditions as needed.

3. Be patient with yourself as experiencing a lot of “first” may be difficult to adjust to.

4. Practice self-care. Your self-care routine may look different, and that’s okay. Having a high energy routine and a low energy routine can ensure your needs are met.

5. Look for small moments of comfort.

6. Remember, you are allowed to step away from for some alone time.

7. Find a way to honor your loved one(s). If your grief is due to being away from family and friends, then reach out for a virtual chat. If your grief is due to seasonal depression, then check out this blog for five ways to cope with Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD).

8. If you are struggling with loneliness, then consider connecting with your family, friends, your faith’s community, a meetup group in your interest, or volunteering.

9. Grief is not only an emotional experience, but a physical one. Listen to and tend to your physical needs.

10. Practice self-compassion through positive and uplifting self-talk. Give yourself some grace.

11. Typically, there are expectations from others on how and where you should spend your holiday season. Communicate your boundaries and needs with others.

12. If you are overwhelmed by holiday tasks (decorating, shopping for gifts, holiday parties, cooking, etc.), then consider taking a step back from celebrating this year or adjusting your level of participation.

13. If you choose to participate in holiday tasks, don't feel guilty and give yourself permission to enjoy it.

14. Cope how you need to cope. Others may have an opinion about how you should and shouldn’t feel. But remember, everyone grieves differently.

15. Practice gratitude. Find small moments of appreciation and savor it.

16. Seek and accept support from your support system, mental health professional(s), grief support group and/or close friends. Also, you can receive mental health support from the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by dialing or texting ‘988’.